What the Gospel Is Not, In Seven Words or Less

Inspired by Nick Ahern’s contribution, “The Gospel In Seven Words Or Less“, to the previous Christian Century post, I’m christening a contest of my own.  In the original post, people come up with a sentence (no more than seven words long) that boils down the message of the Christian Gospel.  One of his examples was “Having died and rise, Jesus conquers death.”

English: By Rembrandt.
“The Evangelist Matthew Inspired by an Angel” (Rembrandt)

In this contest, however, you are challenged to present (in seven words or less) a gospel that we Christians sometimes find ourselves believing, even though it isn’t  the heart of the Gospel.

Example:  “Jesus Christ, my slightly judgmental genie.”

Your turn 🙂

Allen Marshall O'Brien

Allen Marshall O’Brien is the pastor of a UCC church in Northern California and co-host of the Irenicast. He believes in the importance of education, peace, and ecology, throws things to his border collie Sonata, and writes for multiple platforms.

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  • Tommy

    – a nice break between NFL sunday

  • “God hates you, and you deserve it.”

  • They’re going to hell, I’m not, neener!

    • I like how you incorporated the word “neener” into yours, it seems to capture the heart of what yours gets at.

  • Try harder, God will love you more.

    • This one makes me horribly sad. I think I’ll go have a cry now.

  • Shawn Tolley

    The judgement of everyone except me.

  • michael heckert

    a get out of jail free card

    • Classic. Next time I play Monopoly, I’m going to replace that chance card with the “thumbs-up-winking” Jesus.

  • Eureka! You’re not made for this world!

  • Jesus is OK, but I am awesome.

  • Vicky

    Now my morality is superior to yours.

  • Aaron Garness

    I obey therefore God accepts me

  • Luke Allison

    Stealing candy = Holocaust. You’re screwed. So Jesus!

  • Mike

    U.S.A!! U.S.A!! U.S.A!! U.S.A!! U.S.A!! U.S.A!! U.S.A!!

  • Mike 2.0

    Please leave critical reasoning at the door.

  • God, guns, and the Good ole U.S. of A.

  • Tommy

    So hungry… ooo crackers and juice!

  • From an editorial in our newspaper: Creative niceness trumps faith in doubtful Jesus.

    • Wow, that’s a pretty good one. I get the whole “Christians suck at being Christians” thing, but faith in this “doubtful Jesus” calls people way beyond niceness… even as far as loving one’s enemies.

  • Pingback: What the gospel is not | theoutwardquest()

  • Bekah

    I’m going to Heaven because I believe.

  • Anonymous

    drinking the law’s poison expecting a cure

  • Connie

    Love yourself so you can love others.

  • ‘Some of me, some of God.’

  • Jesus, my savior, hates who I hate.

  • If I just believe, I’ll be happy. (or rich, or good, or better, or perfect)

  • Pingback: Summarizing the Gospel (in 7 words) | internetmonk.com()

  • Magic Words: asking Jesus into my heart

    • birdwoman

      The true gospel isn`t the Angloamerican gospel.

  • Michael A. Rodgers

    Three strikes and you’re special.

  • Pingback: Beauty and Thanks « an irenicon()

  • Anonymous

    Donate my ministry, be rich and well.

    Ok “Donate [to] my” is bad grammar but its my first go…

  • “Donate to my ministry; be rich & healthy”

    (Does the ampersand count as a word or as punctuation?)

  • Said these words? you’re heavenbound; else hellbound